Tuesday, September 6, 2016
It was due to the swing set. And a busy playground. And a two year old with a mind of her own.
She was sitting at my feet digging in the dirt and the next moment she's running for the swings. I casually start after her until it dawns on me that she is not headed toward the swings, no, she is headed directly into the swings. Taking the most direct route possible to the next available swing, she heads straight through the mid-line of the swing set. While other children actively swing. I run after her yelling out something like "Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!" as images of black eyes and concussions flash through my head. One mama grabs her baby's swing, interrupting it's trajectory toward Cora's left temple. The next mama does not see the insane toddler's mad dash for the vacant swing next to her son. At this point my arms are in full extension, willing them to go into a full on go-go-gadchet stretch. I gasp. Miracles of all miracles, it misses. She makes it and turns to look at me with a smile, completely oblivious to her luck or the scattered circle of moms looking on wide eyed in her direction.
But I'm not oblivious to those moms. I heard the chorus of gasps during her mad sprint and I saw their wide eyes. I help Cora into the swing and sneak a quick glance around to try to size up the situation. I ready myself for the judgment as I prepare to offer a pathetic apology for my lack of mom-ness in that moment. But all that I see looking back at me is solidarity. Or better yet, MOMidarity. They shot me knowing looks and with a smirk and a relieved chuckle, we shook our heads. And that was it, nothing more. The playground resumed its normal activity.
And for that, I wanted to say thank you mamas. Thank you for your momidarity. Thank you for your quick reflexes, your kindness and your concern. Thank you for leaving the judgement at the door and instead offering this mama a little grace. In a culture so focused on the "mommy wars" and the drama of the in-fighting of the motherhood crowd, this recent incident made me stop and reflect. And based on the sound statistical data I came up with during my brief reflection (that in no way included any type of actual research past my own feelings), I think it's safe to say that those that participate in the mommy-wars are the minority. I think that the majority understand that we are all here, everyday showing up and doing our best. I think that most of us understand that it takes a village. I think that most of us give grace instead of judgement. I think most of us understand that there is no one-size-fits-all in this marathon called motherhood. And I think most of us stand in momidarity.
So, all the fist bumps and high-fives to you, mamas! Together, we've got this.